Cultural Perspectives: Personal Space and Filial Piety

One thing I was struck by upon returning to Taiwan was the feel at the airport. And really, it’s a feel that is kind of intrinsic to this place. You just get the feeling that everyone is doing something together and are part of, in a way, the same family. It’s been said before. The West has more of an “individualistic” point of view and the East is more “collective”. I would say this is true and even extends to the concept of physical space here.

For example, in America, when people are passing one another while walking, they kind of awkwardly navigate around each other so that there is minimal infraction of personal space. Americans are really quite uncomfortable being close to each other. And it’s funny, because although we sort of think of Asians as more strict and conservative than we are, they are actually warmer and more sentimental with touch and attitude. Their work environment is stricter and their work ethics and study attitudes are more severe.

However, the idea of caring for each other as family is even reflected by the language used to refer to someone who is a stranger. They call each other, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, mother and father. Because many Taiwanese people are essentially the progeny of people from the Chinese Han dynasty, this attitude of social harmony and filial piety is said to have come from Confucius. Check this section out from a wikipedia article on “Confucianism”.

“Confucianism is an ethical and philosophical system developed from the teachings of the Chinese philosopher Confucius (孔夫子 Kǒng Fūzǐ, or K'ung-fu-tzu, lit. "Master Kong", 551–479 BCE). Confucianism originated as an "ethical-sociopolitical teaching" during the Spring and Autumn Period, but later developed metaphysical and cosmological elements in the Han Dynasty…

Social harmony—the great goal of Confucianism—therefore results in part from every individual knowing his or her place in the social order, and playing his or her part well. When Duke Jing of Qi asked about government, by which he meant proper administration so as to bring social harmony, Confucius replied:

There is government, when the prince is prince, and the minister is minister; when the father is father, and the son is son. (Analects XII, 11, trans. Legge)

Relationships are central to Confucianism. Particular duties arise from one's particular situation in relation to others. The individual stands simultaneously in several different relationships with different people: as a junior in relation to parents and elders, and as a senior in relation to younger siblings, students, and others. While juniors are considered in Confucianism to owe their seniors reverence, seniors also have duties of benevolence and concern toward juniors. The same is true with the husband and wife relationship where the husband needs to show benevolence towards his wife and the wife needs to respect the husband in return. This theme of mutuality still exists in East Asian cultures even to this day.

The Five Bonds

• Ruler to Ruled
• Father to Son
• Husband to Wife
• Elder Brother to Younger Brother
• Friend to Friend…

"Filial piety" (Chinese: 孝; pinyin: xiào) is considered one of the great virtues and must be shown towards both the living and the dead (including even remote ancestors). The term "filial" (meaning "of a child") characterizes the respect that a child should show to his parents.”

So now, going back to the concept of physical space or personal space. Taiwanese people, to an annoying and even dangerous extent, ignore personal space when walking and driving. They just kind of walk straight and then don’t even adjust until it’s absolutely necessary, or sometimes, not at all. 

This space concept can also be observed in a convenience store for example. In America, I will wait for the person in front of me to complete their transaction and allow them a comfortable space to collect their things and get going. In Asia, they just swipe right in front of you, sometimes nudging you or bumping you in the process. They do not wait for you to move. This has been very difficult for me to adjust to and I still get angry at people for doing this. Just the other day, I was standing in front of a lunch counter ordering, and this teenage boy, instead of just stepping around me, decided to traverse the one foot of floor space in front of me and the counter without even saying excuse me or looking at me. I mean, these people literally have NO IDEA about a concept that what they are doing might be rude (clearly because this is a cultural thing).

And the cars, especially taxis don’t stop in the crosswalk. They just keep plowing on into you even while you are directly in front of them. I mean, when it comes down to it, they’ll stop if they absolutely have to. But generally, they will keep moving at all costs, making the pedestrian extremely uncomfortable. I know many foreigners who live in fear of having their heels run over. 

So that’s another huge difference between here and the states. Pedestrians walk on water in the states. In Asia, they are expected to get the hell out of the way or be run over. I mean, when I was in America, I had cars stopping for me even when I wasn’t even trying to cross the street and it just looked like I wanted to. On an empty road at night as well, people would stop and let me go. Drivers in America are petrified of encroaching on pedestrian personal space, and pedestrians walk with gusto, having the knowledge that things are this way. It is kind of funny to see western pedestrian gusto and eastern driving gusto collide. Every time a foreigner crosses the street, it's like a showdown at the OK Corral. This analogy is less hyperbole than it seems.

The lack of personal space is especially evident in small alleys where day or night markets are being held. The day markets are like farmers' markets and the night markets are more like a carnival combined with an outdoor mall. At any rate, there are a whole lot of people packed into these alleys with a whole lot of merchandise and there are a whole lot of consumers walking round the place. Yet lo and behold, you will see people driving...cars and trucks through the markets. Scooters routinely drive on through too and it just leaves you wondering, why not pick a different road to go down? Once again...totally normal here in Taiwan. 

Same thing goes for if you're sitting out on the sidewalk at a cafe or restaurant. I remember my friends and I were sitting eating a meal, and a scooter came barreling towards me. Without thinking twice I stood up and moved my stool, allowing him to pass as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened. My friend commented, "I like how you just do that automatically now". Haha. Yea well some things you get used to and others you don't. Actually, in the States, I felt awkward at times when cars would wait for me and I actually intended for them to go first. You kind of feel pressured to move faster. There are good and bad things about both ways although it is almost unarguably safer for a pedestrian in the States.

Also, my walking style kind of changed since I've been in Asia. I'm more a of a beeline walker now. You could tell people were kind of taken aback by that when I was walking back home. It's just the unwritten rules of walking. It's just funny that we take it for granite. It took my personal space being violated over and over again for me to finally start redefining my concept of personal space.
Well, that's it for this chapter in my on going chronicle, "The Empire Strikes Back, a pithy memoir of my brief visit back home." By the way, your comments are welcome if you feel like leaving one.
-Sloppy

Bali, Indonesia

Well, it's finally here. Vacation time, one of the major perks of being a teacher. One of the benefits of being on vacation in east Asia is its close proximity relative to paradise getaways. Last year I went to Thailand and got a pretty good fleecing. This year I'm going to Bali and doing it right. Judy booked a sweet villa in farm country close to a tourist friendly, but very relaxed and non crowded beach called Echo Beach in the Changu region of Bali. The first day, we arrived at our storybook villa. The tropical forrest grew all around us, frogs and lizards hopped and crawled their way into the grooves of the straw mat ceilings and wooden beams and orange fish swam in the two fountains at either side of the base of the steps. The interior was dimly lit and made of wood, complimented by lace thin curtains hanging in more than three places. As we made our way through the sliding wooden doors, the masculine sun penetrated through a naked sunroof where rain fell when it pleased upon the head of the statue of a Hindu deity surrounded by a fertile garden. To the right, a kitchen with a swinging window that opened to what looks like the rainforest. To the left, the bathroom, painted blue and adorned with stained glass lamps and Balinese artwork.
 When we arrived, the host, Morgan, provided us with a scooter. This was my first time on a scooter that I was driving. And it was a foreign country with very few stop lights where they drive on the left side of the often very narrow road. Judy rode on the back as we went slow at first and feared for our lives at every turn. But now, on day 5, I scoot about at will without fear. We are in farm country, so there isn't much to be had without driving there to get it. Although, we didn't know any better and on the first day, walked out in the blazing hot sun in search of nothing that we found. Morgan called us on the cell phone that was waiting for us at the villa when we arrived and talked some sense into us. From the villa we could scoot out to the beach or order food to be delivered. We chose the beach and ate BBQ as we watched the sunset. Quite nice. Although the BBQ was mediocre at best. Never fear though because with trial comes error, and eventual success. On day, 5, today, we ate tandoori chicken from a charcoal pit BBQ with no grate with some fried rice. It was rich in charcoal flavor and quite piquant, more than making up for our first "meh" experience. The meal costed an astonishing 50 cents, or 4500 Rupiyah. The conversion rate is ridiculous...9000 IDR is 1 USD. Anyway, we returned home and slept peacefully among the summertime sounds of crickets in the tall grass and whatever other  of God's marvelous creatures therein resided.
On day two we headed out to Kuta beach by way of our hired driver for 40 US a day. Our driver's name is Made, and he knows the score. You need anything, you ask Made, and he calls and sets it up at a reasonable price or takes you to where you buy the "real" version of whatever you want so you don't get fleeced. He's already "made" our trip much better, no pun intended. Thanks Made! Kuta is a tourist trap in every sense of the word. Taxis lurk around every corner, trying to whisk you away at quadruple the normal price with the cry of "you need taxi, yes!", as though if they answer for you, it will somehow change the fact that you have already hired a driver for the day. Tavel agents hound you at every stand, trying to sell you boat rides to adjoining islands. Merchants call at you from every shop to buy their stupid t-shirts and useless knickknacks at grossly inflated prices comparable to the local economy. You forget you are in a foreign country because of the presence of all of the Starbucks and BK's and Wendy's and various other relics of the west which I intentionally left behind but yet refused to stay back. This is also the place where you can buy "bloody fresh mushroom shakes" of the magic variety if you so choose. They are apparently legal but I sincerely doubt the veracity of this claim given Indonesia's draconian penalties for drug offenses. I.e; you get caught in possession of marijuana, you get 5 years in an Indonesian prison that you will not likely get out of alive plus a HUGE fine to boot. And they do bust foreigners and throw them in prison, so don't mess with that stuff here. They are either illegal or the merchants of Kuta beach and other tourist places in Bali get a pass. Anyway, use at your own risk. The thing is, if you need something special, you might have to go to Kuta to get it. Otherwise, stay the hell out. Even the beaches are covered in trash. It's a damn shame. And the Indonesians don't even care. They just sunbathe in an opening in the littered beach. Blech.
Day three, we went to Echo Beach again like we did on the first day. It's a surfer beach and the waves are really powerful. I boogie boarded and took a pounding. The edge of the beach is quite rocky, so it's a bit dangerous in that way, but it was fun. I'm planning to rent a longboard next time and try surfing. I will assuredly take a pounding. At night we went back to the villa and ordered massages which we got in the villa for 20 a piece for and hour each. Not bad.
Day four we went to Ubud. Ubud is worth a visit. We saw traditional Balinese dance in the morning and that was pretty cool, although we couldnt understand a word they were saying and had no clue what was going on. The accompanying music was really exotic. The traditional music here is wild. They have retained quite a bit of their culture here and that's good to see. They haven't been totally McDonald'sed yet. We then went to the monkey forest which is really like a jungle where monkeys walk up to you and jump on you and stuff. They're wild animals and they have big sharp teeth though, so that is kind of scary. One of them bit Judy but I didn't push him cause it would have made it worse. They're pretty cool though, just like humans.
Today, we went to the beach in the south called Geger and just fried in the sun. I got cooked today. The sun is so intense. We then went to a watersports beach and I rode a jetski which was a lot of fun. Now we are at the beetlenut cafe where we are using the wifi to write this. We have wifi at the villa but it works poorly. Tomorrow we will ride bikes down the side of a volcano and drink kopiluwak, the coffee that Jack Nicholson drinks in "The Bucket List". What can I say, it's a hard life.
Fun facts about Bali,
Every family builds a temple. So basically, there is a temple every 20 feet or so. 
They are mostly Hindu on Bali although there is also the Balinese traditional religion.
In Greater Indonesia, they are mostly Muslim. 
They speak Indonesian, Balinese and sometimes English.
One thing that's really great about here is that the food is really cheap and the fresh juice is fantastic!
Ok that's all for now! Goodnight!

The Experience of Living Abroad

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My current job is immeasurably better than my last job. At the time of leaving, there was the threat that although I wouldn’t have to teach 8 straight periods anymore, I would have more spread out through the week. Even still, my new job is immeasurably better. As it turns out, I teach about 5 more classes a week than I did before. But these classes are all bilingual and have good English proficiency. And most importantly, they are all DIFFERENT. 2 sections of each grade from 1 to 6, then one of each from 7-9 and a high school elective. It makes all the difference in the world. And there are long breaks in between classes usually. Usually it’s like 2 then a long break. Or 3 at most, then a long break and two more. There are days I only teach two classes. Anyway, my schedule is fabulous. I also can do what I want with the curriculum except for when the December show is in preparation in which case myself and everyone else are slaves to it.

I haven’t posted so many blog entries because I always feel as though I need to say something meaningful. But then I realize that there are throngs upon throngs of people who put their ramblings up without a second thought. Even on youtube, there are hordes of dimwits that treat us to impromptu recordings of complete nonsense coming out of their mouths in no particular order, topped off with long awkward pauses  as they access the vast tombs of knowledge hidden away in their minds. Of course, as they realize that these tombs are empty, we too have the pleasure of realizing that we’ve just wasted 30  seconds or a minute of our lives.

But that’s only in video form. In the written form, we have the modern pharoses foretelling  of the disaster du jour. Usually has something to do with homosexuals, teachers or Obama taking our country straight to hell in a hand basket. But of course we have other gems such as the fiscal cliff  and the debt ceiling debate and other such nonsense. What tripe and drivel. And really, these days, that's all you get. Tripe and drivel. So I figure why not add my two cents. I haven't decided whether I will write tripe or drivel yet, but I guess we'll just see how it develops and after a point, I'm sure it will lean one way or the other.

This brings me to my next point. As much as I love hearing idiots prattle on and on about things they know nothing about, there is one thing I REALY love about those who wish to spout their political philosophies at work.  I really love it when people who were too lazy or didn't care enough to vote tell us what they think about how our current President elect is totally destroying our country. Seems to me that if you did not participate in the one voluntary act that actually makes a difference in politics (voting) then you really have forfeited your right to complain about ANYTHING to do with politics. But I have to remind myself to ignore it so that I don't spend my social capital stating an opposition which in effect will make absolutely no difference to anyone other than to make my office a more awkward place.

So this week I have a throat cold and it’s making me quite the curmudgeon . I think I am also dealing with a bit of seasonal doldrums with the sun gone away and all. I have one more week of teaching and then a one month vacation at which time I will be visiting Bali for 10 days. So yes friends, Sloppy is still living it up in Asia. Last year I went to Thailand, and this year it’s Bali. Two of the top travel destinations on the planet. I remember hearing about the night club bombing in Bali and thinking “where the hell is Bali?”. Much the same as I did before I came to Taiwan. But here I am and I'm actually going to be IN Bali in a few weeks. Although perhaps the previous reference was not the most inspiring overture to that trip. Reminds me of that Dr. Seuss book, "Oh the places you'll go!"

            I think when you are living abroad, you begin to access parts of yourself that you never knew about. You begin to feel what it’s like to be an immigrant, albeit a highly regarded one. But when you’re in America and you’re just born there and living there and I guess you take your status for granted a little. Not that it’s so fantastically awesome to live in America. I mean life sucks for a lot of people in the states. Just that you devote areas of your brain to your new life and that way of thinking/being becomes part of who you are. Like thinking in a different language for example is really exhausting. So you begin to sympathize with people who have to do that. I really hate it when Americans dog people for not knowing English. Expand your mind. We are not the only country on the earth. And when you go round acting like you own the place, just remember that we stole it from the Natives first.
I’m not really effectively communicating here. What I really mean to say is that you start to realize that every little thing is different in each country. Like if you eat at an Indian place and you eat the tikka masala or whatever, you begin to think you have an idea of what Indian food is. And you do have a small idea but there is so much more that you don’t know. So that your original concept of what that food is like may totally change and you may realize that tikka masala actually is not very representative of Indian food. I don’t know if it is or not but I’m just saying as an example. Now I know that sounds very elementary, but to be there and to live that. It has a powerful transformative effect on the mind. Because it’s not just some exercise in novelty. Same with language. You learn how to say “ni hao” or whatever. But to make yourself internalize it and use it like it’s normal. Tough task. But it is normal here. And that is the craziest thing. That in other places, things that are totally crazy to you are normal there. And once again, to say that sounds elementary, but you don’t really understand how exciting that is until you live it. I guess, to say it simply, your world view expands.
I feel that when you are at home you are always viewing things through this plexi glass window. You can touch it or try it then go back to being the way you were before. You can still say that “this is my reality”. But to know that that can change is amazing. And that is actually the norm, not the exception. Because there are just so many cultures and there just isn’t one right way to do it.

Sometimes I talk about politics. And I did vote, so I can do that :). I feel that it may be part of the problem in the states that people are just too stuck in their ways. I mean people in West VA or Central PA or wherever may think “this is my backyard” and this is how we do it here and this is how it’s always been done. But when the reality of change comes around, and it always does, they resist it. If you only know one way of life, you are afraid to death that it will change cause you have never done that. But I think we are really affected by how we view other cultures and the idea of change. Some people are so opposed to change that they even abhor the very thought of it. They can’t even stand if someone else wants to change.  It’s really poisonous. I think the more of us that realize that change is the constant, not the exception, the more peace we will have in our country.